Saturday, December 24, 2011

Christmas firsts

Today is Sam's first Christmas.  Of course, last Christmas he was still in my tummy so that doesn't count.  Christmas actually came a day early for him.  We opened our presents on Christmas eve because we're getting ready for our trip to Hawaii.  We took Sam to see Santa.  It's his first time to sit on Santa's lap, and I was surprised that he behaved.  I was afraid he was going to throw a fit.  I gotta say, he looked so much better than Santa in the picture :).

Now, I tried to upload the picture but apparently, it was too refer to the facebook photo.  

As I write this blog, Sam is peaceful and warm in his bed while Josh and I enjoy a few glasses of wine, cheese, and pizza.  This past year has been exciting.  I am relishing every moment with my family right now.  Merry Christmas all and God bless.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Frustrated Mom

I've neglected to blog the last couple of months.  Trying to get this house in order, family visits, getting sick for the longest time in history, and just being plainly mom and wife takes a toll.  And now, I think i'm at my wits end trying to be a good mom.  I know there's no such thing as a perfect parent, or a perfect child.  I know that babies will do things their way, in their own time, but as a parent, I can't help compare my child to other babies his age.  And that's when I start getting frustrated and question myself what i'm doing wrong.

The last few weeks, I've been having a difficult time getting Sam to drink his milk.  When he was younger, I couldn't feed him enough.  When he started teething at 5 1/2 months, that's when I started having problems.  He wouldn't drink his milk and I was concerned that he's not getting enough.  He started eating solids at 4 months, the usual cereal and then progressing to fruit and vegetables. Since he's eating solids well, that somewhat gave me comfort.  When we moved, his routines have significantly changed along with change of time and scenery.  And now, I don't feel like I could keep him on an establish routine and that frustrates me.  About 2 weeks ago, his milk intake has decreased again.  Since he's biting at everything and drooling like there's no tomorrow, I figured he's teething...again.  So from drinking 24 ounces a day, he's down to 15-16 ounces.  We try to supplement by giving him cheese, ice cream, and cottage cheese.  I just don't feel comfortable and I would feel at ease if he drinks more.

Along with not drinking, his continued use of binky frustrates me.  While he drinks his milk, he takes a break in between and wants to suck on his binky.  This is probably my fault because he started doing this when he was younger and it has continued on...only because I wanted him to drink all of his milk.  And now, I can't get rid of the habit.  

He's now 11-months old.  I know that there are many things that at this age he should be doing like holding his own bottle.  But with the way his been drinking his milk, I can't get him to hold it.  I've given up on getting him to drink from a sippy cup.  It's just not going to happen.  On the other hand, he is able to hold his cup with straw and drinks from it without any problems. 

On a more positive note, Sam can feed himself and is able to pick up small cuts of food like bread, cheese, fruits, and cereals.  This morning though, I had such a hard time giving him his breakfast...i'm guessing he's getting tired of his normal fare (oatmeal with pureed fruit).  He did eat his breakfast after I put small cuts of banana in it.  Sam started taking a step when he was about 10 months old and is now able to walk around unassisted.  I might have gone overboard with having him watching TV so we're correcting that by playing and just having music.  He's a busy boy.  He likes to climb and throw stuff.  Now if only I can get him to focus and sit still, I will be happy.

I've always wanted not to be the perfect mom, but at least a good one.  I don't think I am a bad mom, but there are times when I ask myself if I'm doing enough.  I chose to stay at home to make sure that Sam reaches his potentials.  I wanted to see every progress he makes.  I wanted to make sure that I am there every time he reaches a milestone and to make sure that he gets all the attention he needs.  But I constantly ask myself if I'm doing enough for him, and when he doesn't do things that he should be doing at his age, I feel like a failure.  I've failed him and i've failed me.  And so I wonder if I made the right decision of staying home or going to work.  Would things have been different if I put him in daycare?  Would he have learned more?  I tend to be harsh on myself, and it could be either a good thing or a bad thing.  I don't hear a lot of parents having the same frustrations as I do, or maybe I just don't know about them because they don't share it the way that I do.  Either way, it'd be nice to know that other mom's are going through the same thing.  

Things to look forward to in the next few weeks:  Christmas  of course, going to Hawaii, and Sam's first birthday.  Exciting!

P.S.  I do feel better after writing this.  Now I can go and do laundry. :)

Friday, October 14, 2011

Family visit

The past few weeks have been busy.  Between Sam and getting the house ready for my mom and sister's visit, it has been hectic.  Not to mention Josh flying off the San Diego for his quarterly reserves drill, life has been crazy.  It's beginning to slow down again.  I think we finally got the house down for the most part.  It's to the point where I can live with it now, but I know there's still a gazillion things that I want to change, replace, and fix.  The main thing is, most of the clutter are gone.  It has not been easy trying to clean up  and fix a house with a baby.  

Sam turned 9 months old a couple of weeks ago.  Three more months and he will be one.  I remember last year around this time, I was 6 months pregnant and I came to visit Josh.  Now, we live here and Sam is getting big, fast.  Time sure flies.  Though I wish it would slow down just a bit so I can catch my breath, it is also exciting to see what's next.  We celebrated Sam's 9 months with cupcake.  As evidenced by this picture, he enjoyed his cupcake very much.  We did have to deal with a bit of sugar-induced hyperactivity.

My mom and sister visited us for about 10 days.  It was a great visit, although I wish it was longer.  Sam was a bit unsure at first.  He cried when we picked them up from the airport, but it didn't take him long to warm up.  He slept with his grandma at night and played with his aunt during the day, after running around and sightseeing. We went to Williamsburg and Yorktown for some history lessons, shopping, and DC.  

After my mom and sister left, I started to feel homesick.  Everything became even more real to me.  I miss home, however, I also realized that leaving home has taught me a lot of become more independent and self-sufficient.  Not that I wasn't those two things before, but I felt event more now.  So although I miss home, I am still grateful for what I have:  Josh and Sam.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Another year past, another year to look forward to

So today, I celebrated my 31st birthday.  Wow!  I am 31-years old.  I gotta say, it doesn't feel like it sometimes.  Some days I feel younger, and then there are days when I feel I'm 20 years older.  The past year has brought so many changes and challenges.  I had Sam and then we moved.  Through it all, God has blessed me with good health and lots of help:  a loving husband, family, and friends.  Though I feel like i'm starting a new here in Virginia, I have never felt more love and support.  And Sam, the greatest blessing i've ever received, he brings me immense joy that even on my worst days, I'm never lonely.

This year, my birthday was extra special.  No fancy dinner, no elaborate celebration, just a simple dinner made by Josh, a store bought pumpkin cheesecake for dessert.  But what made it extra special is the love that I got today.  Yeah, Sam didn't let me sleep in and almost cost me a front tooth, but that boy gave me smiles, and kisses, and hugs.  And Josh, he gave me the best gift:  more time off from Sam.  And of course a gift certificate for a mani and pedi.  I love that he knew what I would love to have right now, that although it's not expensive (compared to birthday gifts I received in the past from him), that it actually means a lot more.  Most of all, I got to spend my entire day with my boys.  To all those who greeted and remembered me on my special day, thank you very much.  

As for settling down, we finally have a couch, and it's awesome.  God blessed us with a nice 55 inch TV as well.  Josh's friend was selling his TV and gave us a great deal for it.  God really knows our needs, or wants for that matter.  Soon we should be able to entertain friends.  I told Josh though that until all the boxes in our basement are unpacked and put away, we will just have to put off having guests.  I'm a little stickler about it.  I just feel embarrassed showing a messy home to friends.  Soon though.  Very soon.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Is it really Sunday?

Now that I no longer work, i've been losing track of days.  It's been so busy and hectic lately trying to adjust to East coast time, having Sam start a new routine and adjust to east cost time, and cleaning and making a comfortable home for us, that sometimes I forget the time, day, or date.  I even thought it was still July.  So today I woke up and Josh was still in bed.  Sam was starting to fuss in his crib, and it was only 6:30 AM. Of course his alarm went off (poopy diaper is his wake up call), and so he needed to be changed.  Since he didn't want to settle down, I fed him his breakfast, and I wondered why the parking lot in front of our house is still full.  I realized it's Sunday.  Already!?!!?!

I didn't realize that this is our third weekend here in VA.  The first weekend we were here was a blur.  I don't remember it at all.  The second weekend, Josh went on his monthly drill in Andrews AFB.  And now our third.  So how did we spend this weekend?  Well first off, I gave up my Hawaii license and car tags yesterday.  Virginia DMV has got to have the worst DMV i've ever been too.  Not only was the wait long (first you have to line up to get a number at the information desk where they "make sure" you have all the papers in necessary, then they give you a number and you wait for them to call your number), customer service is non-existent.  The guy(s) that help me were stern and "no-nonsense."  Not even a smile, or "what can I help you with?"  Since i've been waiting, i've already pre-filled my paper work except for the things that I really don't know how to answer.  One of the question was, when did I buy my car.  Heck if I remember!  I know it was September 2006 and so I told him so, but NO!  He wanted the exact date.  So I made up one...well, I think it was close enough.  And then there was the picture taking for my license.  No such thing as "stand there by the white wall."  It's more like "take your picture." So I said, "here?" and so he responds "yes." So I wait and wait for him to take a picture, he kept fiddling with his computer and I started talking to Sam waiting for him to give me further instruction, and then all of a sudden, a flash!  I am very interested to see what the picture will be in my driver's license.  I won't be surprised if I was cross eyed or making funny faces.  So in all, the guy was a total jerk and I hope I won't have to deal with him anytime soon.  The sad part is, I probably will keep a crappy looking license for the next 7 years.

After our CRAZY stint at the DMV, we went shopping in Ikea.  I love Ikea.  It's cheap and they have cheap food, especially their chocolate cake.  I could spend hours there looking at household items, but of course neither Josh nor Sam will allow me.  So we got what we needed (including a late lunch/snack consisting of Swedish meatballs with mash potato, gravy, and lingonberry sauce, plus a slice of chocolate cake) and hopped over to Babies r Us which of course is Sam's favorite store.  We got Josh a jogging stroller and some other necessities.   Then off to home we go.

Today was an equally busy day.  Like I said, Sam was up quite early.  After his breakfast, we decided to go back to bed and watched Nick Jr.  While Sam watched Blues Clues, I ended up falling asleep, and eventually, Sam did too.  We had to scrap our plans of going to church since by the time Sam and I woke up, it was nearly 10 AM.  So instead, Josh decided to finish painting the living room while Sam and I lazily watched more Nick Jr.  Glad we missed Olivia this time.  After Sam ate his lunch, we were off to Target for more shopping, then ended up driving to DC to buy a kitchen cart that we wanted from Bed, Bath, and Beyond.  Out of all the 10 stores near our area, they only had the item in DC.  It was a worthwhile trip since we found out that the item was on clearance, I could use my 20% off coupon and I saved $100!  So it was all worth driving...not that I was the one driving.

I realize as I am writing this that all we have been doing is going out to buy "stuff" for the house.  I can't recall doing anything "leisurely" in the past 3 weeks.  I am hoping that in the next 2 weeks that everything will start to settle down.  Our couch will be delivered this Thursday, the living has been painted with the color of my choosing, and the TV will be in place.  Eventually, we should be able to finish painting the dining area, and hopefully unpack the rest of our things.  It's a slow process and it can get a bit frustrating, but I know it will all be done in due time. 

Friday, August 19, 2011

The joys of being a stay home mom and housewife

It's been over a month since I stopped working to be a full time mom to Sam and a house wife.  There are days when I miss working, I miss the mental challenge, being with colleagues and friends, and the financial independence.  Now that I no longer have that, I have to find ways to stimulate my brain and save money.  I'm learning to coupon -- not the extreme couponer that other people are, but I get ecstatic when I save at least $25 at the grocery. I am learning to stick to buying the necessities rather than on the basis of wanting to try it because it's new or because it looks cool.  This is one thing you don't learn in school...I am getting to see the other side of just being a mom and wife.

Now that I am home with Sam, I get to see every change that he goes through.  Just in the last month, he got his two upper front teeth, learned how to sit on his own, and now he is learning to crawl and about to pop two more teeth (he will probably have 6 by the end of this month).  He is also learning to stand in his crib.  His fine motor skills are improving.  He is now able to pick up his snacks using pincer grasp.  He claps when he feels like it and when mommy kisses his lips, he opens his mouth and sticks his tongue out :).  These are little joys that if I was working, I wouldn't be able to see when it first occurs.  I feel really blessed.  

Our house is coming along better.  Today, we received the window shades that we ordered online and Josh has installed them.  We are halfway done with painting the living room and the new carpet is looking nice and clean.  Now if only they would already deliver our couch, the living room will be almost complete.  

Even with our new home and adventures, I still miss Hawaii once in a while.  I miss my family and friends, and i'm sure that Sam misses his grandparents and aunts.  Even though we skype on a daily basis, it's not enough.  Four more months and we get to go back for Sam's first birthday.  Time sure do fly.  I am looking forward to more adventures but in the meantime, I will be cleaning, vacuuming, and decorating this house!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Settle, settle, settle

Two weeks after we get to Virginia and the house and slowly taking shape. Sam's room is partially decorated and his crib and dresser has been put together thanks to Hubby.  We have our bed now and tonight will be the third night that we've been sleeping on it.  Sam has been doing well on his crib as well and he has been better at sleeping.  If only he could wake up a little later in the morning and everything would be perfect.  The room is painted and today, I finished painting my closet.  Josh has put up the mirror in the bathroom.  One day at a time...and soon this house will actually look good enough to show off (I mean take a picture and post).

Sam and I have not been going out on our own.  Most of our evenings are spent going from store to store buying things for the house.  I do love Home Depot!  I wish I had a lot of money to spare, there's so many more things to update/renovate in this house.  It will be done slowly though.  I'm just glad that we finally have a home we can call our own.  Since it's been hot, we've been eating a lot of ice cream in the last two weeks.  Thanks to coupons, I was able to get some ice cream for cheaper.  However, there is yogurt place here called Nathan's dairy, which is a local favorite, as evidenced by the long line.  Last night, I had mint chocolate with chocolate dip.  It was so good even Sam wanted a bite.  Josh had black raspberry freeze.  It was delish!

Despite our busy days and crazy nights, I still miss home.  This is my home now, and that will eventually become permanent once I get my Virginia license.  I am with my loves, but there are certain things that I miss about Hawaii.  Aside from my family, I actually miss work sometimes.  Don't get me wrong, I love spending the entire day with Sam, but sometimes, I would like to get a break from him too.  Work was my escape from going crazy when Sam gets a little too much to handle.  But now, I have to learn to be 10 times more patient with him.  I miss being able to ask my family to watch Sam while I run to the store, now I have to take him with me everywhere.  I don't miss the stress though.  I do miss having a pay check and going shopping.  LOL.  Oh well.

Tomorrow is shopping day.  Sam eats A LOT! and drinks a lot of milk, which is good since he is a growing boy.  I am cooking a lot more than I have ever done in the past.  Josh insists that he likes my cooking...I remain skeptical of my own abilities.  They are edible, and our stomachs have been okay so I guess it's okay.  I am learning to make balanced meals...meat, starch, vegetables, and fruits.  I just need to learn to drink milk.  All in all, our lives are starting to take form here.  Who know, we might actually like it and stay here for good...maybe.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Messy messy house

It's been a week since we got here.  It's been busy and having been tired from traveling for about a week and a half, it's been really hard trying to get things done.  It doesn't help that Sam's sleeping pattern has been off, and he seems to be a bit fussier since he's also adjusting.  It has been difficult but eventually, this house will become a home.  The main thing is, we have a mattress, we have a crib for Sam, and we have each other.

The weather has and cool.  It was very hot when we got here with temperature in the 90's.  Yesterday, it didn't make it to 80.  Today, I don't know, I haven't gone outside.  But today is a day of rest, at least from house work.  I have been trying to clean and fix our house every single day since we got here.  So far, the only decent place is the pantry and kitchen.   Our dining table is passable, at least we can eat on it.  You don't want to come to our living least not yet.  We have yet to get a couch, an entertainment center, and of course decorate.  Sam's Papa Scott will be visiting in a couple of weeks so I guess we'll have to clean the guest bedroom and furnish it as well.  Josh has his reserve drill this weekend so that leaves me and Sam to continue to clean up the house.  It will be all done in time.

So Sam has 4 teeth now, 2 in the bottom and 2 on top.  He's attempting to crawl now and at 7 months and 1 week, I hope he does soon.  We're working on his pincer grasp and he's been doing well.  Now, if only he can learn how to sign "more" instead of screaming his head off when he hasn't had enough fruit.  He eats really well and is finally improving on his milk intake...I guess since his gums feel better.  I guess I better end this before Sam drops everything that matters.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Home Sweet Home

We are finally home in Manassas, Virginia!  It has been a long journey but we enjoyed visiting with Sam's other half of the family.  We were able to attend Sam's cousin Evy's birthday last Sunday.  He got to spend time with Grandma Barbara, Papa Scott, great grandpa Reel, Aunt Becky and Uncle Jason, and cousins Evy and Easton.  Then we drove to Kentucky/Tennessee to see the Irwin's where he got to meet his Aunt Leslie, Uncle Shawn, and cousins Forrest, Hunter, and Sage.  

We drove the last trek on Wednesday.  It took a whopping 13 hours including stops.  Sam, as usual has been a trooper and behaved most of the way... well, for the first 12 hours at least.  Imagine yourself being cooped in a car seat for 12 hours and you'd probably be screaming too.  And then finally, we were home.

Our townhouse is located in a quiet community called Point of Woods.  We have an end unit, which is great, especially that Sam likes to scream his head off sometimes.  The house is in a state of disarray right now so I won't post any pictures yet.  Suffice it to say, I have a lot of cleaning, fixing, and unpacking to do.  I hope I won't have to move for a while because unpacking and settling down is a real doozer.  Sam still sleeps in a pack and play while we wait to get him a crib in his own room.  Yes, Sam will be having his own room.  We plan to go and buy some furniture this weekend, and of course, Sam's bed.  His Dad and I sleeps on the futon for now.  Sam is adjusting well though and it's more than I could ask for.  I, on the other hand, misses work sometimes.  I do enjoy being with my boy and of course, hubby.  We are now a Family, together, not separated.  So as my two guys danced to "Romanza," as Josh tries to put Sam to sleep, I myself will bid adieu for now.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Oklahoma and more

We finally arrived in Oklahoma on Wednesday night. We got here so late due to a couple of emergency stops. Sam's stomach must not have been feeling good that day. At least we arrived safe and sound. Thursday was rest day. We spent the day napping and just catching up with Sam's Gramma Barbara. He also got to meet his Aunt Becky for the first time. Luckily Sam didn't get too fussy and he got to hang out for a bit until he went to sleep.

Today was equally uneventful except for the fact that it is Josh and I's anniversary. We've been married 8 years. Can you believe it. He'd say 8 long years and I say, it still feels like yesterday. What makes today more special is that we have Sam now. Our anniversary celebration wa simple. We had a great Mexican dinner at Abuello's and we went to see Harry Potter in IMAX 3d. Then we went home...thanks to my mother-in-law for taking care of Sam so that Josh and I can have a date night.

There are so many things to be grateful for. If I recount them one by one, this blog will become a novel. Importantly though, I jus want to day how grateful I am for the family and support that we have. We are very blessed. Josh and I won't be where we are now if not for everyone's love and support.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

First leg done!

With the first leg of our trip done,  all I can think of is just getting to Virginia and settling down. I was worried about Sam today and how he's going to tolerate the long ride.  Fortunately, he was such a good boy all throughout.  He's a trooper.  He slept most of the way, and when he wasn't sleeping, he was contented playing.  He had his moments of fussiness of course, especially when he was starting to tire out or when his hungry.  We even had to stop at the side of the road to change his dirty diaper.  Now, that was an experience.  But he was cool about it.  He must've felt hot and uncomfortable too.  I mean, who really likes sitting in a car seat for hours at a time.  But we survived it, and I am just glad it's least for now.

Sam was such a social butterfly at the rest stops.  He attracted so many people, smiling and cooing at them.  I noticed however, that on some occasions, he had this sad look in his eyes.  He keeps looking around as if he was looking for someone.  I think he might be wondering why the long car ride, and why nothing is familiar.  He probably wonders why we sleep in different beds and not in his crib.  My heart breaks every time I think that he must miss his grandma and grandpa and Aunt Jenny and Aunt Veah and Aunt Marivel and John.  It breaks my heart that my mom keeps crying every time we talk on the phone.  But this is the path we've chosen, at least for now.  I know that Sam will be able to adjust, and so will my family.  It will take time but it will happen.

Tomorrow, we move to the second leg of our trip, and finally Sam will meet his other set of grandparents.  This is the first time that he will be seeing them, and that is quite exciting.  I hope he behaves well, just as he has been for the last 6 months.  Then off to our new home.  The adventure begins.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Luggage, check. Car, check. We are ready.

Finally got the car picked up from Matson this morning. Unfortunately, we forgot the CD for the navigation system.  Acura felt that Hawaii wasn't part of the US and so we had to have a separate CD for Hawaii.  We forgot to change the CD, so now we are left with a navigation system that won't work because it is "out of coverage area."  Thank goodness for iphones and apps.  Josh downloaded an app to navigate our way, until we get to Oklahoma where the disc will be waiting (thanks to Jenny for express mailing it).

Today we got to visit with our friend, Susan, and Uncle Ed and Auntie Delin (that was after we went looking for a dealership to purchase a CD for the navigation system, but of course they don't sell it.  GRRRRR!).  It was a good day (thanks to Uncle Ed and Auntie Delin for the food and Sam's stuff). Then off to Barstow we go.   As I write this, I am sitting in our hotel room while Sam sleeps and Josh is trying to fall asleep.

Tomorrow, we start the first leg of the trip.  I am both excited, ambivalent, and scared.  It is Sam's first long car ride.  So far, we have survived just us three without any mishaps.  Sam, although occasionally fussy, has been manageable.  I think he wonders why Grandma, Grandpa, Auntie Jenny, Auntie Bhel, and John's not around.  I think he wonders why it's just Mommy and Daddy.  Maybe it's just me, but his eyes seem sad.  And it breaks my heart.  Grandma, oh she misses Sammy a lot.  She is heartbroken and I don't blame her.   I would be too.  But although I sympathize and understand her plight, this is important for us.  We have been apart for too long.  Time flies and i'm sure in not time, Sam will be reunited with his grandparents and aunts and uncle again.  In no God's time.

So the journey to home begins

We left Hawaii today. It was a day full of tears. It breaks my heart seeing my parents cry. I know it's hard for them letting go of Sam. My sister Jenny, I don't even know where to begin. At some point, we all find our destiny. Sometimes, it means leaving behind the people that you love most. For us, it was especially hard because is Sam. Sam us the first long awaited grandchild. And so the tears...

Sam seem to sense all if these. He clung to his grandma,smiled at grandma, wanted to be held by grandma. It's heartbreaking. But it's also exciting. We are now a family. Josh gets to see Sam grow, meet milestones, smile, and be touched by him. And so the real journey begins. I can't wait to see what's in store.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Sam's First 4th of July and on Parenting

Today is Sam's first 4th of July.  It wasn't much of a celebration since his Dad isn't here.  At the same time, he was getting sleepy just as the fireworks started.  He did wear his shirt proudly.  We are more than grateful for all the men and women who have sacrificed and are still sacrificing so much so that we can sleep well at night, knowing we are safe.  

Sam also gave his Aunt Jenny some fireworks.  See, Sam had a dirty diaper, so his Grandma took it out.  Since Sam was about to get ready for his bath, Grandma opted not to put a clean diaper on.  Since Jenny volunteered to give Sam a bath at night until we leave, she took him from Grandma.  I think he enjoyed this a lot, although he was a bit confused about his Aunt's reaction.

So Aunt Jenny had a bit of a wet firework on her clothes.  I thought it was real cute :).

Lately, i've been having a hard time getting Sam to drink his milk.  He also refuses to drink his water.  I'm concerned because he's not quite meeting his daily milk intake.  At the same time, when he doesn't drink his water, i'm afraid he might get constipated.  He eats his pureed foods with gusto, however, and I am already running low on apple sauce (I just went to the commissary last Saturday).  Maybe i'm being a bit too hard on him.  Sometimes I get so frustrated when he refuses to drink his milk that all I can do is grind my teeth to keep myself from yelling.  Does that make me a bad parent?  I'm not the type to call the doctor for every single thing that worries me.  In fact, other than Sam's routine visits and calling to see if I can put sunblock on him at 5 months, I never really called the doctor.  I am just concerned that if he doesn't eat enough, that he might lose weight.  He's pretty average right now in weight and i'd like to keep it that way.  However, with his renewed activeness and his decreased intake, I worry that it might not sustain him.  I just hope that he'll get over this phase once the teething is done.  

At the end of the day, I chastise myself for getting mad and being frustrated with Sam.  I wonder if anyone else ever feels that way.  I get frustrated so much at times that I grind my teeth so hard my jaw starts hurting.  And then I wonder, what kind of a parent I will be as Sam grows older?  Am I just frustrated right now because I face this problem alone without Josh to keep me at bay or take over when it gets overwhelming?  As a new parent, I regularly assess myself, and everyday, I feel bad when I get mad at my son.  

In less than two weeks, I won't have to face parenting alone.  I am hoping that the worse will be over:  Sam's other tooth would've broken through his gums, and he will start drinking his milk and water again.  I just hope I still have enough patience left until then.  

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Sam is half a year old

I have been trying to write a blog last night to celebrate Sam's half birthday.  Unfortunately, either my computer or the website refused to cooperate and I couldn't post the blog.  So here goes:

Sam turned 6-months old yesterday.  He had an eventful day going to the doctor and getting his shots.  He is generally a happy baby, but for some reason, he seemed to know where we were headed yesterday and what he is about to get, hence the grouchy, uncooperative move.  He cried the whole time the doctor was examining him and while getting weighted, not to mention when he got his shots.  When it was all over, he instinctively calmed down and started to smile.  He even took a quick nap on our way home. 

At 6-months old, Sam is now a whopping 18.1 lbs and 27 inches long.  And he was  happy to know that not only can he eat solid foods for breakfast and dinner, he can eat his favorite applesauce for lunch too.  I guess I will have to go to the store and buy more applesauce. 

Since Sam has been teething (one of his lower tooth broke through the gums, and the other one peeking out), not to mention his multiple shots,  he developed a fever last night.  It's all resolved now, and he seemed to be feeling better this morning.  But as I watched Sam sleep last night, I can't stop being grateful and feel extremely blessed of God's gift to Josh and I.  Happy half birthday, Sam!

Monday, June 27, 2011

A new beginning

When I was young, I use to journal.  As I got older, either I couldn't keep up with my thoughts, or there's not enough time to even think.  But as my family and I embark on a new chapter, I figured this is the best way to share our journeys and experiences to friends and family that we are leaving behind in Hawaii.  So here's the first.

Today was a busy day.  We celebrated Jenny's birthday at the Pineapple Room. Sam had a great time being out of the house and enjoyed looking around Ala Moana.  Sam has been generally well-behaved even though he's teething.  Yes, one of his bottom teeth came out last Friday.  He hasn't been eating well in the past week and I have been worried.  Then I checked, and voila!  His teeth was peeking.  He still smiles and laughs a lot, though i'm sure it's bothering him.  It's hard to believe he's almost 6 months.  Time sure flies.  At around this time last year, I was still unable to believe that I was pregnant.  It was all surreal.  A year later, it still feels surreal.  Josh and I are really blessed though.  Very blessed. 

So as I closed this first blog and put Sam back on his back (he sometimes turns on his stomach when he sleeps and it freaks me out), I just want to say thanks to all my family and friends who didn't stop praying for us to have child.  God answered your prayers and mine.